Monday, March 22, 2010

Sophia's Birth Story

Before I had my first daughter I use to ask my mom about what it was like to give birth and when I say ask I mean gril. "how long does it take" "what does it feel like?" then I moved into more specific questions about when I was born. "Did your water break on it's own?" "How much did I weigh?" "Did you breastfeed me?" "Did you love me instantly?" She was always more than happy to tell me no matter how many times the conversation turned into the day I was born.
I know that one day my daughters will ask me what it was like when I had them and I will have to tell Sophia the truth about her birth. I wish I could tell her that I had an easy labor, that I was sitting at home knitting and my water broke. I wish I could tell her that the doctors put her in my arms and gave me time to nurse her. That I got to room in with her and privately examine her ten little toes and fingers.
But, if I'm going to tell her the truth it goes a little something like this: I was standing in front of the blender on my tiptoes so I could pour a bag of m&ms into a vat of ice cream, milk and sugar. I tell women this particular mixture induces labor. I started to feel dizzy and lightheaded this was my first child so I didn't know what real labor felt like. But, if you've had a child you can agree at the very end of pregnancy everyone is so anxious that if anything out of the ordinary happens to you it automatically means labor " Honey I have a hangnail" "What?!! Get the bag and get in the car"I decided that based on the severity of the dizziness and the fact that my due date was five days away that we should go to the hospital just to be safe. We grabbed the bag and headed for the hospital.
We stopped at Wendy's to get something to eat (something I would later regret). We talked and laughed the whole way there except when the dizziness was too much.
We made it to the hospital and as we went up in the elevator I saw my doctor. Dr. Hyung (For some reason pronounced win aparrently all the letters are silent) she was a small asian lady and she was young waaaay young something my boyfriend couldn't get over. "Johnny she isn't too young" I said "Bullshit,who is she Doogie Howser, hell I'm willing to bet she's younger than me" he was 28 years old and probably right.My doctor didn't like me it was apparent she examined me like I was a dog and spoke to my nurse (A certified Doula) more than she did to me. She didn't smile and she didn't comfort me. The hospital already knew The baby was drug exposed and they acted accordingly. But, my wonderful family and boyfriend helped me through they knew who I was inside and what a big heart I had!! I had already told my mom about using drugs during pregnancy and we got through it she knew I wanted to change.
When it came time to push my boyfriend, my mother and my sister all gathered around me counting and feeding me ice I pushed for three hours and Johnny never left my side. The baby was stuck in my birth canal and I feel like everyone in the hospital had they're hand up there trying to turn her. My boyfriend started to make a fuss and ask for the attending physician.As soon as he came in he scolded the Dr. For making me push for so long and told me they would have to use forceps to deliver her. It was awful but one pull and she was out. Ripped from my body my baby was not happy I heard the cry of a raptor not a baby.
So here I am waiting for my baby. The Dr. and a young male med student are in between my legs sewing me up. Well, the male is and the Dr. is telling him what to do I'm like "what the hell". As soon as she said to him "no not like that" I was done "Excuse me" I said " I have to walk around with that for the rest of my life would you please have a more experienced person to sew it up not some rookie med student" she got the point and ask the attending to do it. This guy was awesome he picked up my baby and brought her to me. Later my boyfriend would tell me that upon looking at our baby the Dr. Leans in to my boyfriend and says " You messed up young man, this baby is beautiful!" he exclaimed "Well, there's only one thing to do. You can name her Buffalo and that will keep the boys away for a bit other than that you're in trouble son!"
When I looked into my babys eyes for the first time, everything slowed down and I was able to concentrate on this beautiful little creature that came out of such a mess like me. "We did this" I thought "if I can make this happen I can do anything" and right then and there I vowed to do right with my life. Our baby was born 7lbs 4oz. We named her Sophia Annise Rimer and at 10 minutes old she saves our lives and put in motion events that helped shape true happiness and genuine love within our family!

Stayed tuned for my next post Libby's Birth Story

1 comment:

  1. This post made me cry, not because of the slightly traumatic birth, but because it blows me away that a tiny baby can change your life in moments.I think it just demonstrates what a strong and beautiful person you are.